No Sleep

Friday, August 10, 2012

Dear Ranjit,

I’m sitting here in our family room wondering if at this moment they are talking about you in the court room.  Mary wasn’t able to tell me whether or not they were going to make you be there as well.  I know you would if we were there but since we’re not I’m not sure.  I’m picturing your little face standing there scared and shy and my heart breaks that you may not have someone to comfort you.  I know if I was there I’d still be a stranger to you too but at least maybe you could feel even a tiny bit of the love we have for you.  I can’t bring myself to go to bed because somehow in my crazy head I feel like at least if I stay awake then maybe somehow God will help you feel these prayers or a little but of peace knowing your mommy is doing everything she can to be a part of this with you.  If you’re not in court then I hope you’re having fun with your friends and getting some extra love from your ayahs who are like mothers to you and who I know will miss you very much when you come home with us.  God have moved some major mountains for you to come home buddy and I can not wait to get our life started with you.  Your brother and sisters are getting so excited that the day is getting close.  Even Laila comments and says your name when she comes in the kitchen and sees your picture on the refrigerator.

Please know how much we love you sweet boy and can’t wait until you’re home.

Love,

Mommy :)