Wishing for Yesterday and Tomorrow

Many times in the past month or so I have caught myself saying or thinking “I want my old life back.”  I want to live in air conditioning.  I want the time I need to homeschool RJ and work on bonding with him.  I want to go to one grocery store and to buy everything I need to make one dish.  I want to participate in holiday gatherings in person.  I want many things….

Thankfully I have not been stuck in those thoughts.  Maybe it’s your prayers.  The Holy Sprit helps me recognize and take captive those thoughts.  They would be easy to drown in.

I was directly convicted a week or so ago when I saw an old photo of Laila in the hospital.  I had a very vivid memory of saying “I want my life back” that day.  I wanted to be done caring for a sick child and just have a “normal” life (whatever that means).  Oh, what I wouldn’t give to have THAT day back.  To live in it, to soak it in.

The other trap is to wish for tomorrow.  I just want to be done with language school and not have to write papers in Indonesian every day.  I wanted all my own stuff and have a house to be settled into.  I want my kids to have a consistent school from one year to the next.

But the thing is, I’ve not talked to a single person who didn’t wish they had more time for focusing on learning language before diving in to full time “normal” life (whatever that means) in their assigned country.  I don’t know a single person who wouldn’t have some regret about the past to dwell on or wish for change in the future that could make them miss out on today.

Don’t we all get caught in these lies??

Let’s all decide to live in today and let the Lord worry about our tomorrows and yesterdays.  I’d hate to miss out on the blessings of today, wouldn’t you?