Be still and know…

Psalm 46

1 God is our refuge and strength,
a very present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way,
though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam,
though the mountains tremble at its swelling.
4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy habitation of the Most High.
5 God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved;
God will help her when morning dawns.
6 The nations rage, the kingdoms totter;
he utters his voice, the earth melts.
7 The Lord of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.
8 Come, behold the works of the Lord,
how he has brought desolations on the earth.
9 He makes wars cease to the end of the earth;
he breaks the bow and shatters the spear;
he burns the chariots with fire.
10 “Be still, and know that I am God.
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!”
11 The Lord of hosts is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.

We just made it out of the recovery room. She was extubated when they brought us back to see her but her stats wouldn’t stay up so they had to reintubate and then it was kinked so they had to do it again. She will likely be intubated for at least a few days. She still has the UTI and now also has worse pneumonia. These are complicating things. She looks so pale and sad and scary.

Jack brought the kids with him when he rushed here last night. Tomorrow they are enforcing visitation restrictions for flu season (March, really??) and the kids will no longer be able to visit. My choice would not be to let them see her like this but we have no other choice.

Lord we need you, oh we need you.

So the hallway from pre-op to surgery waiting and back is lined with these orange fish so you know your way. I’m SO sick of that hallway I could scream. I may or may not have attacked this fish, ripped him and thrown a fit…